Imposter syndrome – Are you a swindler if you do not perform perfectly?
It is hard for everyone to adapt to a new situation. You are admitted to the university, suddenly the expectations are different, you have to study more, the exams are more difficult.
If you got used to it in high school that you almost did not have to study, the curriculum just went into your head and you had a good GPA, then suddenly it can be scary that now with a lot of study and practice you might only get pass or, satisfactory grades.
It may happen that you think that you are not suitable, that you were admitted by mistake, that you are not “good enough” to complete your major.
In most cases this feeling and difficulty will pass over time, as you become more experienced in completing university tasks.
But there are those who do not go away with these thoughts, and they can even get stronger when they already receive positive feedback.
What could be the reason?
Basically, it is more typical for those who have low self-esteem. This feeling can also be strengthened by the fact that in your childhood you were compared to your brother or anyone else, and you tried to do everything to be able to perform at the same level as the other child. On the other hand, it may also have happened that your parents and teachers constantly praised your intelligence, your talent, you made good progress, everything seemed to happen by itself. Then when the difficulties start, you feel that you cannot maintain the standard that you are used to, as if you are “cheating” your environment, “playing” how smart you are, while you experience, that things are not going well.
This idea is reinforced by the stereotypes you may have heard from people important to you, so you have adopted them. For example: “Success is for the lucky.” “Every good thing is followed by something bad.” “You can never be satisfied with what you have achieved, you must always go further.”
This gives you the impression that whatever you accomplish is not your merit, while your environment recognizes your success. That is why you experience this as if you are cheating them.
This phenomenon has been researched since 1978 (Clance and Imes). The name of the phenomenon originates from the English word impostor, referring to the fact that those who suffer from this impostor syndrome experience an intense sense of deception.
Nearly 70% of people experience this syndrome in at least one life situation. It appears regardless of education and gender.
Symptoms include:
- Worry that others will find out that you are not as smart or as talented as they think you are
- What you achieve, you think was “easy”, you were just “lucky”
- You want to do everything perfectly
- You cannot stand it when you make mistakes
- If you get any kind of criticism, you think you have failed
- You think that other are more educated, smarter, more talented than you
- You are constantly afraid of being found out as a fraud
This can also lead to workaholism, when you do not enjoy what you study or work for, but do it in order to always please everyone. External recognition is the appropriate feedback, but it no longer fills you with joy, only maximum relief. In the long term, this can lead to burnout, impair your role in social relationships and cause eating and sleeping disorders.
What can you do to avoid this?
- Write a diary about your successes. (You can separate out what required luck, but be realistic!)
- Make yourself aware that your thoughts are not realistic. Saying this helps change a lot.
- Accept that there are areas where someone is more qualified than you. You can also ask him/her for help to achieve even more success. It is natural that you are not the best at everything.
- Talk about your feelings. You get support from your friends and group mates and you get to know like-minded people.
- If you make a mistake, see it as an opportunity to improve. It is natural that you cannot solve everything perfectly. This task will be even better next time.
If you still feel that your pursuit of perfection is getting beyond you and you cannot handle it, contact our psychologist at
Source:
Clance, P. R., Imes, S. A. (1978). The imposter phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. Psychology and Psychotherapy: Theory, Research and Practice, 15(3): 241-7.
Helstáb L. (2019.09.12). „Alkalmatlan vagyok, ki fognak rúgni” – kezdeti szorongás, vagy imposztor szindróma? Letöltés dátuma: 2023.01.26., forrás: Mindset Pszichológia: https://mindsetpszichologia.hu/alkalmatlan-vagyok-ki-fognak-rugni-kezdeti-szorongas-vagy-imposztor-szindroma
Kovács K. (2018.05.31). Csalónak érzed magad? – Így küzdd le az imposztor-szindrómát! Letöltés dátuma: 2023.01.26., forrás: Mindset Pszichológia: https://mindsetpszichologia.hu/csalonak-erzed-magad-igy-kuzdd-le-az-imposztor-szindromat